Well all as it turns out as of five minutes ago I am not pregnant.Yeah it fucking sucks just like always I get all the symptoms and they turn out to be false.Why is this happening to me is the meds they put me on did they fuck me up and now I can't have any more children or does God just hate me.Or is it that everyone else is blessed with gift after gift and I'm only meant to have one like my mom.I'm starting to fucking hate life again but I refuse to go back on my meds I will not foul my body with that toxic crap any longer.
I'm so depressed,and pissed and I hurt and I'm never gonna be able to give the love of my life a special gift.I don't even wanna tell him cause hes just gonna say its ok and we can keep trying but that's not good enough.It will never be good enough.I don't get it why can all these skanky bitches who don't really even want them have all these kids and they can't even take care of them and all I can have is one.
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